Michael J. Fox has revealed a secret health issue he faced on top of his ongoing battle with Parkinson's disease.
The 59-year-old actor said it was the "darkest moment" of his life two years ago when doctors discovered a noncancerous tumour in his spine required urgent surgery. The tumour was growing rapidly and causing tremendous pain for the Back To The Future star.
"I was heading for paralysis if I didn't get it operated on," Fox told People magazine, adding that the surgery was risky. "[The tumour] was constricting the [spinal] cord, so they had to be very careful in removing it so they wouldn't do further damage."
Thankfully, the operation was a success and he underwent rehabilitation and learnt to walk again in the four months that followed. But Fox wasn't out of the woods just yet, suffering a setback after falling and breaking his arm.
"That was definitely my darkest moment," he recalled. "I just snapped. I was leaning against the wall in my kitchen, waiting for the ambulance to come, and I felt like, 'This is as low as it gets for me.' It was when I questioned everything. Like, 'I can't put a shiny face on this. There's no bright side to this, no upside. This is just all regret and pain.'"
Stuck in bed for long stretches of time, the actor said he questioned his optimism. He had been living with Parkinson's disease since his 1998 diagnosis and, although he was always positive about his health, his latest setback put him in a dark hole. But his gratitude for life eventually changed his outlook.
"Optimism is really rooted in gratitude," said Fox, who shares four children — Sam, 31, twins Aquinnah and Schuyler, both 25, and daughter Esmé, 19 — with wife Tracy Pollan.
"Optimism is sustainable when you keep coming back to gratitude, and what follows from that is acceptance. Accepting that this thing has happened, and you accept it for what it is."
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2020-11-04 21:16:00Z
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