It’s become increasingly common for streaming platforms to give viewers a trigger warning when they’re about to see some confronting storytelling.
But it’s not yet common practice in cinemas, possibly because there’s an understanding that audiences have made a deliberate, multi-step choice before they walk into that room.
So, it’s unusual that Irish drama Herself flashes up a domestic violence warning before the start.
But it’s thoughtful that it does because even though the scenes of violence are brief, Herself vividly captures the many aspects of psychological, emotional and physical abuse. The sometimes-unrecognised markers of domestic violence could be as triggering as a punch.
Directed by filmmaker and theatre doyenne Phyllida Lloyd (The Iron Lady), Herself humanises the complexity of domestic violence through a simple but resonant story written by Clare Dunne and Malcolm Campbell.
Dunne also stars as Sandra, a young mother with two daughters, Emma and Molly.
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Thrust into the social housing system after her husband Gary (Ian Lloyd Anderson) attacks her, Sandra and her girls are placed in temporary accommodation at an airport hotel where they’re not allowed to walk through the lobby, only the back stairway.
The transitory nature of an airport hotel is a strong metaphor for the liminal place she finds herself – stuck between two places, but without an exit plan. Juggling multiple jobs, school runs and the trauma of having to face Gary every week during custody hand-offs, Sandra is at breaking point.
Craving stability and an anchor, she comes across the idea of building her own house – all she needs is a plot of land and 35,000 euros. Not so feasible when you’ve been left with nothing and no real pathway.
Sandra’s challenges are great, but so is the ragtag community of friends and supporters she lucks into, including her employer Peggy (Harriet Walter), contractor Aido (Conleth Hill), workmate Amy (Ericka Roe).
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There’s a version – an easier version – of Herself in which it’s the story of a woman down on her luck who’s helped by the kindness of near strangers, and everything turns out triumphantly.
But life isn’t that easy, and abusive husbands don’t vanish, leaving you to get on with your magically happy life.
Sandra is beset by PTSD from the abuse she suffered and dealing with complicated emotions of fear and regret but also a longing for the “good” Gary that he was. And he plays into it by trying to manipulate her with gifts and pleas to reunite, “for the children”.
Herself gives full credit to the truth that domestic violence is never as clear-cut as “why didn’t she just leave”.
Through Dunne’s nuanced and compassionate portrayal of Sandra, a mixture of grit and sadness, hope and frustration, we get this fully fleshed character that gives life to the struggles of many women in similar situations.
Herself doesn’t take the easy road but it’s that choice which makes it such a human story.
Rating: 4/5
Herself is in cinemas now
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2021-07-01 10:43:38Z
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