After bowing out last week, The Bachelor’s secret frontrunner returns to the mansion on Thursday night in a last-minute shake-up where she appears to give Jimmy an ultimatum that requires him to either quit his piloting career or somehow find a way to reschedule all local and international flight timetables — just so they can spend their nights together watching The Block.
It’s a big demand. And also a longshot. Like when it’s after midnight and you ask your partner to go buy you ice cream from the nearest 24-7 servo.
JAMES WEIR RECAPS: Read all the recaps here
We begin with a single date where Jimmy and Carly are tasked with designing and applying a temporary tattoo on each other. This whole experience could be wonderfully bogan but they just ruin it every step of the way by being sentimental. The tattoo they design? A compass. Yawn. Jimmy carefully traces it onto Carly’s shoulderblade and she delicately sketches it onto his chest. Of course, we’ve had to step in and fix it in Photoshop.
Please note, tonight’s episode includes a 20 minute ocean obstacle course with inflatable props. I endured it so you don’t have to. It has been omitted from this recap. You can show your thanks by getting a barbed wire tattoo like the one superimposed on Carly’s bicep in the above photos.
We arrive at the cocktail party and things are feeling flat. Then we realise we’ve reached that time of the series where all the villains and crazies have been dumped and only the nice girls are left. What we’d give for some mild side-eye or a crude insult.
The producers are scrambling to try create some excitement and then, finally, Osher is pushed out onto the patio. He’s dazed and confused — practically breathless. More than usual.
“Jimmy,” he whispers. “I’m gonna need you to come with me — right now.”
When Jimmy returns, he brings with him everyone’s worst nightmare: an extra contestant who we thought we got rid of.
After bowing out last week because of a family death, Brooke has decided to return. Or … did Jimmy beg producers to get her back because she’s the only one who he actually wants to be with? We know this because, last week, he got busted talking to his sister when he thought the cameras were off and we heard him name Brooke as his number one pick. Ugh, just the fact that I can recall that information on demand makes me feel sick.
Lily bursts into tears and so do we. She sobs because now there’s one more girl to compete with. We sob because we’re worried this additional girl will add an extra week onto the series.
Brooke’s returned to the mansion with a definite attitude. She played too nice the first time ‘round. This time, she’s not afraid of stepping on toes to get what she wants. And that extends to the man she’s trying to win.
As the episode wraps and the promo for next week plays, we witness her issuing a request. Nay! A demand.
“You work nights, I work in the morning. I wanna spend nights with my partner,” she tells Jimmy.
Sorry Brooke, but international flight schedules will not be altered just so you and Jimmy can watch The Block together every Sunday, Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday.
“I can’t change my roster,” Jimmy furrows his brow. “I don’t want someone to resent me for what I’m doing.”
Away from Brooke, he’s annoyed. Sure, the pandemic resulted in him getting stood down from his Jetstar piloting gig. But that’s just temporary. He’s got dreams! Jetstar was just a stepping stone! His goal is to fly for an airline whose passengers wear shoes. How dare Brooke get in the way of that.
“I’m not sure what kind of epiphany Brooke’s had in the last 24 hours but it’s a little bit concerning,” he tells us.
It’s absolutely concerning. And it raises a broader issue for the nation. Let’s normalise only seeing spouses twice a week. And having separate apartments.
https://news.google.com/__i/rss/rd/articles/CBMipQFodHRwczovL3d3dy5uZXdzLmNvbS5hdS9lbnRlcnRhaW5tZW50L3R2L3JlYWxpdHktdHYvdGhlLWJhY2hlbG9yL2phbWVzLXdlaXItcmVjYXBzLXRoZS1iYWNoZWxvci1hdXN0cmFsaWEtMjAyMS1lcGlzb2RlLTEwL25ld3Mtc3RvcnkvMTFjNzE3NmEyZmQ3MTQ2OWJkOTA4Y2MxZDRmNzAyNjPSAaUBaHR0cHM6Ly9hbXAubmV3cy5jb20uYXUvZW50ZXJ0YWlubWVudC90di9yZWFsaXR5LXR2L3RoZS1iYWNoZWxvci9qYW1lcy13ZWlyLXJlY2Fwcy10aGUtYmFjaGVsb3ItYXVzdHJhbGlhLTIwMjEtZXBpc29kZS0xMC9uZXdzLXN0b3J5LzExYzcxNzZhMmZkNzE0NjliZDkwOGNjMWQ0ZjcwMjYz?oc=5
2021-08-19 10:50:48Z
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